Borderline Personality Disorder: Understanding, Coping, and Healing

Borderline personality disorder, often abbreviated as BPD, affects millions of people around the world. And it can dramatically impact the lives and relationships of the individuals who suffer from the condition. But just what is borderline personality disorder?

What Is Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)?

Borderline personality disorder is a mental health condition, specifically a type of personality disorder.

Borderline personality disorder is typified by a long-term pattern of unstable, strong, and potentially explosive emotions. Sufferers of borderline personality disorder have difficulties regulating their emotions, which can cause negative consequences to all aspects of their lives.

Borderline personality disorder is considered one of the most potentially damaging mental health conditions. BPD is closely associated with self-harm, suicide, reckless behavior, substance misuse, behavioral and chemical addiction, and criminal behavior.

In fact, borderline personality disorder causes such a wide range of symptoms (everything from depression to eating disorders) that it is very frequently misdiagnosed.

For many years, borderline personality disorder was widely believed to be untreatable. Luckily, we now know that is not the case. There has been recent success in treating the condition, although it is not curable.

There is no reason an individual with borderline personality disorder cannot live a normal and productive life.

Common Misconceptions about Borderline Personality Disorder

Borderline personality disorder is one of the most misunderstood and stigmatized mental health conditions.

Some of the most common misconceptions about borderline personality disorder include:

• BPD is untreatable. While there is no cure for BPD, a combination of medicines and therapy can dramatically improve the quality of most patients’ lives.
• BPD is “attention-seeking” behavior. The intense emotional reactions and behaviors exhibited by borderline personality disorder sufferers are caused by genuine emotional distress and difficulties regulating emotions.
• BPD sufferers are dangerous. BPD sufferers are far, far more likely to injure or even kill themselves than harm anyone else.
• BPD is the same thing as bipolar disorder. While it is common for one patient to exhibit borderline personality disorder and bipolar disorder, they are separate conditions with distinct pathologies, symptoms, and causes.
• BPD sufferers can’t maintain meaningful relationships. While BPD greatly strains many relationships, most BPD sufferers can and do maintain meaningful relationships, especially when receiving proper treatment and support.
• Medication alone is enough to treat borderline personality disorder. In fact, therapy is considered more effective at treating borderline personality disorder than medication, and any meaningful BPD treatment program must include both therapy and medication.
• BPD sufferers can’t succeed in life. Millions of individuals with BPD maintain highly successful careers, raise healthy families, and have great achievements in many fields and hobbies.
• Only women suffer from BPD. Although traditionally women have been two to three times as likely to be diagnosed with BPD as men, recent studies have found that the actual difference is statistically insignificant.

Borderline Personality Disorder Symptoms

Borderline personality disorder can cause a wide variety of symptoms, which can vary dramatically from person to person or even from day to day within the same person. However, some of the most common include:

• Long-term patterns of emotional volatility.
• Difficulty regulating emotions.
• Explosive emotions.
• Emotional irritability.
• Intense mood swings.
• Feelings of emptiness.
• Impulsive behaviors.
• Self-harm.
• Suicidal thoughts and behaviors.
• Feeling disconnected.
• Intense anger and rage.
• Chronic sense of loneliness.
• Difficulty with establishing and maintaining healthy intimate relationships.
• Unstable relationships.
• Fear of abandonment.
• Idealization and devaluation of others, often in quick succession.
• Brief psychotic or pseudo-psychotic episodes.

Causes of Borderline Personality Disorder

The causes of borderline personality disorder have not been thoroughly researched and are not well understood. It is safe to say that most of what is propagated about the causes of borderline personality disorder is more theory than fact.

However, there are several factors that seem to be involved in the development of BPD, including:

• Genetics: Family and twin studies have shown that there is likely a hereditary component to BPD. However, no specific genes have been linked to the condition, and the genetic influence is hard to separate from environmental influences.
• Trauma: It is thought that trauma influences the development of BPD. Childhood trauma, especially neglect, physical or sexual abuse, emotional mistreatment, and inconsistent caregiving, is thought to greatly impact the development of BPD.
• Brain chemistry, structure, and functioning: Some evidence suggests that BPD sufferers may have a different brain chemistry, structure, and functioning than others. Regions of the brain involved in processing emotions and impulse control are thought to be affected, such as the neurotransmitter systems, amygdala, prefrontal cortex, and insula.
• Biology: It is thought that BPD sufferers may have a biological sensitivity to emotional stimuli. This might make them more prone to suffering rapidly changing and strong emotions.
• Family history: A family history of BPD is closely linked with an individual developing the condition. Additionally, growing up in a family environment where emotions were invalidated or dismissed is also thought to make developing BPD more likely.
• Personality traits: Certain personality traits are thought to influence the development of BPD, such as high levels of neuroticism and impulsivity.

Treatment Options for Borderline Personality Disorder

Borderline disorder is not curable. However, it is possible to dramatically reduce the severity of some symptoms and equally possible to dramatically reduce how severely the condition impacts the sufferer’s life.

It is widely believed in the mental health community that the only way to effectively treat borderline personality disorder is through a combination of medication and therapy.

“Dialectical behavior therapy, which focuses on developing skills in emotion regulation, distress tolerance, interpersonal effectiveness, and mindfulness, can be especially effective,” says psychiatric mental health nurse practitioner (PMHNP) Valerie Puffenberger. “That, coupled with medication, like mood stabilizers or antidepressants to address specific symptoms or co-occurring conditions, forms a complete treatment plan.”

Medication for Borderline Personality Disorder

Medications are not as useful for treating borderline personality disorder as they are for many other mental health conditions. However, a number of medications have proven useful at alleviating BPD symptoms. Some of the most important include:

• Anxiolytics: Alleviate the anxiety associated with borderline personality disorder and minimize emotional fluctuations.
• Antipsychotics: Alleviate or eliminate symptoms such as mood swings, anger, rage, and brief psychotic episodes.
• Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs): Reduce the severity and occurrence of mood swings and impulsivity.

Psychotherapy for Borderline Personality Disorder

Psychotherapy is considered the most effective treatment for borderline personality disorder.

The main goal of psychotherapy is to increase the patient’s awareness of themself and their disorder to minimize the impacts of BPD on their life. In some cases, therapy may help alleviate symptoms or prevent episodes altogether.

Some of the most effective psychotherapy treatments for BPD include:

• Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT): The most widely researched, used, and recognized treatment for BPD. It combines cognitive and behavioral elements with mindfulness practices to help patients tolerate distress, manage intense emotions, and develop healthier relationships.
• Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT): Helps individuals identify and change negative thought patterns and behaviors. CBT also helps BPD patients recognize their moods and emotions better while improving how they react to them.
• Schema-focused therapy: Helps patients identify and modify deep-seated beliefs and patterns.

What if I Am Diagnosed with BPD?

If you’ve recently found out you have BPD, remember there’s a path to recovery with the right kind of help and support.

Puffenberger provides the following guidance for those who have recently been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder:

• Reach out to mental health professionals who specialize in BPD. They’re the experts who can guide you.
• Learn about the disorder and pick up coping skills to manage those tricky symptoms.
• Therapy can be a game-changer. Dialectical behavior therapy is a solid option that’s shown some great results.
• Having people who get it around you matters. Friends, family, or support groups that understand can make a real difference.
• Don’t forget to take care of yourself. Prioritize your own well-being.
• Healing doesn’t happen overnight, so be kind and patient with yourself.
• And always remember, you’re not alone. Reaching out for help is a brave step toward getting your mental health back on track.

Living with Borderline Personality Disorder

Borderline personality disorder can make life very difficult. However, there are many strategies and techniques that can make living with BPD much easier:

• Seek and continue to seek professional help. The best way to properly manage BPD is to seek out and continue to participate in professional therapy.
• Practice mindfulness. Being aware of yourself and your internal processes makes a dramatic difference when emotions start to fluctuate. Even when you can’t control your emotions, you can still control the actions that stem from them.
• Set boundaries. Healthy boundaries can improve the quality of relationships of those impacted by BPD.
• Practice self-care. Individuals who are medically healthier and in a happier, more relaxed state of mind will be less impacted by BPD.
• Prioritize physical well-being. Those who are in good physical health are less likely to experience severe BPD episodes.
• Have a strong support network. Having a network of friends and family improves the overall well-being of the BPD sufferer. It can also serve as a warning siren for abnormal behavior and as a means of preventing disaster when the condition causes strong symptoms.

When Your Loved One Has BPD

Individuals with borderline personality disorder can often be very hurtful to their loved ones. The mood swings and intense emotions caused by borderline personality disorder often impact those around the sufferer even more than the sufferer themself. However, there are many ways that you can make your life easier.

Some of the most important strategies you can use if your loved one has borderline personality disorder:

• Educate yourself.
• Practice empathy.
• Set and enforce healthy boundaries.
• Stay calm.
• Communicate openly.
• Validate their emotions.
• Practice active and non-judgmental listening.
• Be patient.
• Avoid judgment.
• Offer support, not solutions.
• Avoid arguing.
• Offer encouragement.
• Respect their autonomy.
• Stay consistent.
• Encourage and enable professional help.
• Be mindful of triggers.
• Encourage self-care.
• Seek support for yourself.
• Manage your expectations.
• Celebrate progress.

Find Support for Borderline Personality Disorder

Borderline personality disorder can dramatically impact the lives of those who suffer from the disease and their loved ones. Tragically, BPD is often fatal, with some estimates claiming that up to 10% of those who suffer from the disease will end their own lives.

However, there is hope out there. A combination of intensive therapy and proper medication can dramatically improve your life.

Legacy Healing Center believes that the only way to properly treat BPD is with a three-pronged approach, which includes:

1. The right psychotropic medications.
2. Evidence-based psychotherapy.
3. Peer support.

We are here to help you or your loved one recover from BPD, along with any co-occurring mental health or substance abuse issues. All you have to do is call 888-534-2295 to speak with a staff member and embark on the road to treatment.

Borderline Personality Disorder FAQs

What causes borderline personality disorder?

The causes of borderline personality disorder are not fully understood. There are only theories about what the causes of borderline personality disorder are. However, some of the factors that are thought to influence the development of BPD include:

• Brain chemistry, structure, and functioning.
• Family history.
• Personality traits.

What is the best medication for treating borderline personality disorder?

Medications that treat borderline personality disorder mainly alleviate or reduce the disease’s symptoms. Some of the most commonly used and effective medications used in borderline personality disorder treatment include selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs), antipsychotics, and anxiolytics.

It’s important to note that medication alone is not especially effective for the treatment of borderline personality disorder. A complete treatment program often includes psychotherapy as well.

What are effective treatment options for borderline personality disorder?

In general, the most effective treatment options for borderline personality disorder combine psychotherapy and medications. Specifically, dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) is widely considered the most effective treatment for borderline personality disorder.

How does borderline personality disorder affect a person’s life?

Borderline personality disorder affects a person’s life in countless ways. The extreme and often inappropriate emotional reactions can create behavior that has dramatic impacts. Virtually every aspect of a BPD sufferer’s life is impacted by the disease.

Some of the most common and severe ways that borderline personality disorder affects a person’s life include:

• Loss of life satisfaction.
• Difficulties in school.
• Making it difficult to form lasting, meaningful relationships.
• Damaging those relationships that do form.
• Professional damage.
• Financial loss.
• Risk-taking resulting in injury.
• Increased likelihood of many co-occurring mental health conditions such as anxiety or depression.
• Dramatically increased substance abuse and likelihood of addiction.
• Dramatically increased risk of criminal behavior and incarceration.
• Death from accident or suicide.

About the Author

Jeffrey Juergens

Jeff Juergens is a leading author in the addiction and recovery field, dedicating the last seven years of his life to helping those struggling with substance use issues find the help that they need. Jeff's work has been used in rehabs across the country as tools to help patients achieve sobriety.

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Medically Reviewed by

Dr. Edwin Gomez, M.D.

Edwin Gomez, M.D. joined the Legacy Healing Centers Medical Team in 2021. In addition to working at Legacy Healing Centers, Dr. Gomez operates a private practice and research here in the South Florida Area and the Florida Keys. Prior to joining Legacy Healing Center, he served as Medical Dire...

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